This post over at Hoyden has got me thinking about the question (sometimes challenge) “Are you a feminist?”
“Yes”
What about when a simple ‘yes’ is not enough? Maybe because the questioner has bought into the destructive clichés described by Dux in her
article from The Age: “Yes, but I’m not a hair-legged lesbian” or because the questioner has a definition or understanding of feminism that’s different from mine.
Dux suggests that, if they must, today’s women might answer “Yes, but…” ‘I am, but not an anachronistic cliché of a narrow version of second wave radical feminism’.
This construction serves to dampen and shut-down a discussion, and adopts the conventions and definition of feminist used by the questioner. “Yes, but [I don’t fit your idea of what a feminist is because of xyz”.
The other, only slightly less problematic version is “Yes, even though…” Note that this one still lets the questioner define the topic, however it can be used whether you fit into their definition or not. “Yes, even though I’m a hairy-legged lesbian.” “Yes, even though I’m a porn-star”. It’s a way of deflecting the other’s assumption, not countering it. This is positive, but still not ideal.
I’d rather use “Yes, so…” or “Yes, and…” Both of which allow me to define feminism in my own way and to explain and qualify that definition to the questioner. “Yes, so I’m a porn-star” “Yes, and I’m a hairy-legged lesbian”. This counters the unspoken assumption, opens a discussion and keeps it moving and most importantly, lets me define the feminist playing-field for myself.
Am I a feminist?
Yes yes YES
Yes, so I believe in equity, and the movement for social, political and economic equality for all people regardless of gender.”
Yes, and I’m hairy, and queer, and saggy-titted, and big-arsed, and I like rainbows, cats and riding my bike.
Yes, and I’ve put off buying a “this is what a feminist looks like” tee shirt because I worry I’m too close to the anti-feminist stereotype to wear one.
Yes, so I realise that the body hatred this evidences is a product of the very patriarchy I’m fighting against by being a feminist.
Yes so my appearance, behaviour and possible conformity to a cliché created by the patriarchy to destabilise the feminist movement does not define me.
Yes, and my appearance has nothing to do with you.
Yes and I’m not a stereotype, a movement or a poster-child. I’m one of many millions of feminists, and we all look different, act different and think different. That’s part of what makes us feminists.
Yes and I’m proud, and you can ask me anything you like.
Note: I appear to have set up an unconscious feminist dichotomy above with the use of my ‘hairy lesbian’ and ‘porn star’ examples. This is hilarious but completely unintentional. Any other example would work. “Yes I’m a feminist and an astronaut”. “Yes, I’m a feminist but I’m not a circus performer”. Also, it is of course, possible to be hairy, lesbian, a porn star and a feminist all at the same time. Or not.
